John the Wood went out one day
  To view the scene from a different angle
  He stood and watched a child at play
  A-tinkling on an old triangle
  Dave the Drum who was passing by
  Bought the toy with a coin he'd picked up
  You should have seen the gleam in his eye
  As he saw a ?tune he's gleaned up? shined up
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  Out in the rain if you want a cup of tea
  Dodge the puddles in the yard
  The lord of the land's coming round to complain
  It's hard
  The peacock flew to a very high tree
  He didn't like grass or concrete fairies
  Put me where the action is
  I'd rather be with the next-door hairies
  Simon spied the bathroom door
  In his hand's a herb shampoo
  Waiting for the waters raw
  So little time, so much to do
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  Stand in a line, take a book along
  There's time for a game of cards
  Now it's your turn and the water's all gone
  It's cold
  The next to appear was the . . .
  He needs a rest or at least he says so
  You probably think that he's flipped his lid
  'Cos he wears high heels and a snow-white trousseau
  Five foot three yet he stands so tall
  And on the ground his feet are never
  Friends may come and friends may go
  But the fiddle bill goes on for ever
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  The music room would make you grin
  It's cold as a freezing pit
  There's a hole in the wall where a lorry came in
  Let's split
  I quite like a breast of chicken
  And I'm crazy about aspic and roast quails
  But the sight to make my pulse rate quicken
  Is a dozen nice fat snails
  On the other hand, there's Pegg on the bass
  Whose tastes in food are very much wider
  You'll see a smile light up his face
  At a couple of kippers and a glass of cider
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  La la la la la la la la la la la la la
  Stand on a chair if you want to watch the box
  The fleas can jump a mile
  Peer through the haze watching Top Of The Pops
  And smile