Oh I never sneeze when you're around,
  and you never think I have a cold,
  but when I'm all alone I I Ityshoo I need,
  you and a box of handkerchiefs...
    My nose never runs when you're around,
  and you never think I have the flu,
  but when I really do I I Ityshoo I need,
  you and a box of handkerchiefs...
    I catch a cold easy
  when I'm feeling sneezy,
  what I really need's a box of handkerchiefs to please me
  It's you I need, you and a box of handkerchiefs...
    Everytime I go out I get the flu,
  I'm okay one minute then I start sneezing again,
  I sneeze here I sneeze there I'm always sneezing everywhere...
    Oh I never sniff when you're around,
  and you never think I'm really ill,
  oh but I tell you still I I Ityshoo I need,
  you and a box of handkerchiefs.