Doc and Sally inside
   They're cookin' for the down five
   Who're starin' at Miss Rayon
   Who's busy licking up her pig-pen
   I'm searching for my mainline
   I said I couldn't hit it sideways
   I said I couldn't hit it sideways
   just like Sister Ray said
  
   Rosey and Miss Rayon
   They're busy waiting for her booster
   who just got back from Carolina
   said she didn't like the weather
   They're busy waiting for her Sailor
   who's dressed in pink and leather
   (alt: who said he's just as big as ever)
   He's just here from Alabama
   he wants to know a way to earn a dollar
   I'm searching for my mainer
   I said I couldn't hit it sideways
   I said I couldn't hit it sideways
   just like Sister Ray said
  
   Cecil's got his new piece
   He cocks and shoots it bang between three & four
   He aims it at the Sailor
   Shoots him down dead on the floor
   Aw, you shouldn't do that
   Don't you know you'll stain the carpet
   Now don't you know you'll stain the carpet
   And by the way have you got a dollar
   Oh, no man, I haven't got the time-time
   She's busy sucking on a ding-dong
   He's busy sucking on my ding-dong
   just like Sister Ray said
   I'm searching for my mainline
   I said I c-c-c-couldn't hit it sideways
   I said I c-c-c-couldn't hit it sideways
   just like Sister Ray says
  
   Who's that knocking
   Who's that knocking on my chamber door
   Could it be the police?
   They come and take me for a ride-ride
   But I haven't got the time-time
   She's been sucking on my ding-dong
   She's busy sucking on my ding-dong
   Just like Sister Ray said
   I'm searching for my mainline
   I couldn't hit it sideways
   I couldn't hit it sideways
   just like .... Sister Ray says