When you start your journey, you go and meet your driver
  You shake his hand, and hope he's feeling well
  The things to come may be somewhat unfamiliar
  Like eating herring where the sun does not go down
  Our driver calculates what time we'll hit town
    And every time a border comes
  We go inside and meet with someone
  Perhaps a form will need to be filled in
  Then we can go and restart up the engines
    Plumbing often varies in the various different countries
  I like to crouch down and turn on those bidets
  I'll have a cocktail, pick at my fingernails
  And then I'll squat down for a wash to end the day
  Our driver recommends we try the souffle
    And every time a border comes
  We go inside and meet with someone
  Perhaps a form will need to be filled in
  Then we can go and restart up the engines
    Then we went down under, and we were told of farmers
  Who brought some pigs here from the old country
  But pigs eat turtle eggs and turtles eat jellyfish
  And now you get stung if you're swimming in the sea
  Our driver gestures out behind the palm trees
    And every time a border comes
  We go inside and meet with someone
  Perhaps a form will need to be filled in
  Then we can go and restart up the engines