This is the Awards for Industry and Free Enterprise
   So let me sit you down and tell you how I won first prize
   I took on your free enterprise and your pretty little shops
   Walked in with empty bags and walked out with the lot
  
   Chorus:
   So I've come for my award, I've come for my award
   I thought I'd come in person that's the least I can afford
   Let hands be shook
   Champagne poured
   Sentence ignored
   Yes. I've come for my award
  
   Chorus
  
   I chatted with your guards and winked at roving eye
   A thousand hidden cameras were searching cross the sky
   But they didn't see me pinch them from underneath their eyes
  
   Chorus:
   Jesus was my greatest accomplice
   Jesus was my greatest accomplice
   Jesus was my greatest accomplice
   Yes, I've come for my award
  
   Hairdrier, overcoat, telly, dot-to-dot
   Video, compact disc, there's nothing we forgot
   Whilst I was busy smiling my father got the lot
   I've come for my Award